Friday, January 1, 2016

The All Important Whisky Page

As an "artist" I am notoriously difficult to work with. Often I ask to be paid in part with whisky, but not whiskey.

I ask that buyers of my paintings buy me a great whisky that I either love or have not tried before, and so this page is here to help you, the potential buyer of one of my paintings, with some guiding information to help you buy me a whisky I will be glad to receive.

In general, I would rather be given a bottle that:
* I have not tried before
* is heavily peated (or smoky flavoured)
* is really yummy

Whisky I would like to try
Bruichladdich - Octomore (any version)
Ardbeg - Corryvreckan
Ardbeg - Supernova
Lagavulin - 12 year old
Laphroaig - (anything older than 12 years)
Port Ellen - (anything)

Whisky I've had before and could happily have again
Caol ila - Cask Strength
Caol ila - 12
Laphroaig - Quarter Cask
Big Peat - either Christmas Edition or normal version
Lagavilin - 16 year old
Bruichladdich Pot Charlotte - Peat Project

Whisky I have tried and do NOT need to try again
Johnnie Walker - Green
Talisker - 10
Talisker - Storm

If you are still unsure, print this page out and take it to your whisky specialist and let them help you.


Sunday, December 13, 2015

New Work : Boundless Plains To Share

"For those who've come across the seas
We've boundless plains to share"
These are lyrics to the often unsung second verse of our national anthem Advance Australia Fair.

This painting will be for sale this Tuesday night at an art show to raise money for the Asylum Seeker Resource Centre. They are a fantastic and very necessary organisation. Please lend them your support.

The exhibition called Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is, and is on show for a very limited time at The Old Bar, in Fitzroy.

Sunday, March 22, 2015

Coach Savage And Her Unicorns - painting sale this week!!

This new painting will be sold this week, to raise money for the mighty Old Bar Unicorns football team's 2015 campaign. 

A prominent Melbourne critic has recently written...

"Local artist, Ben Butcher, has (rather unfairly) been afforded the misleading moniker,  "Australia's Worst Artist". This title does little justice to the scope and aesthetic ambition exemplified in Butcher's latest work, "Coach Savage And Her Unicorns". 
Butcher thrusts a blended indoor/outdoor scenario at the viewer, as a black leather-clad Cash Savage, The Unicorn's coach, has her minions literally chained to her, just as she (and by proxy, the team) are connected by invisible tendrils to the bar itself. 
Team supporters will recognise Mapo's brilliant mark over the head of Old Bar figurehead, Joel Morrison; whilst a lonely figure facing the bar seems somehow to be psychically pulled, guitar-in-hand, towards the footy oval, along with the viewer's eye. Amidst all this, the artist (presumably) wields a beer and bat, as if momentarily forgetting the nature of the drunken game being celebrated by his team-mates, in a veritable maelstrom of strong, primary colours. A tiny penguin divides the frame in the foreground, as if to affirm what followers of Butcher's art have long suspected - forget about Australia, Ben Butcher is quite possibly the Worst Artist in the World! And more power to him, and the pub football team he represents." - Matt Gleeson

This painting will be available for viewing and sale from 7pm, Tuesday 24th March at the Old Bar Gallery, 74 Johnston Street Fitzroy, Vic, Australia. 

Monday, August 18, 2014

Julian Assange and Paul Cregan at Goolmangar Primary School

(click to embiggen)
Paul was telling me how as a kid he went to school with Julian Assange.

Here is a scene of them in tractor tyres for an army tank, with a stick as a cannon...  I don't know who the two kids playing basketball are.

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

Hiccups are an attention seeking device - serious medical theory

Medical Theory  : Hiccups are linked to the need for social attention. (or, Hiccups are an attention seeking device.)

I can't be arsed writing a proper paper so I'm publishing the idea here.

But basically, I propose that as an infant, hiccups are the one thing that gets you adoring attention without you being blamed or accused of doing it on purpose. You hiccup, then everyone goes "ooowww.. isn't that cute". Free attention gained!

In my own research conducted by and on myself, I have found that hiccups are far more difficult to get rid of, until the point of time where someone notices the hiccups. Then I can get rid of them far more easily.

As a life-long hiccupper (or perhaps hiccuppee) I have tried every method to get rid of bouts of hiccups, and although they have worked for a while, eventually that method was no longer effective. I guess the novelty had worn off for spectators. "Oh he's doing that thing again". Attention wane!

The "cures" that are more elaborate and comical or complex and enjoyable for outsiders to witness, are usually the more successful. It has been said (by people, needs citation) that it's because the brain is working hard on the complex task that distracts the body from hiccuping, but I also reckon the added attention from drinking a cup of water upside down, whilst standing on one leg may also help satisfy the human in question and diminish the need to hiccup. Attention gained!

I call upon the medical community to do some research and prove my theory... but in the meantime, remember where you heard it first.

p.s. I googled it once, and there didn't seem to be anyone else claiming this idea...

Wednesday, May 28, 2014

the only thing worse than being talked about... being panned in the media for "having standards"

Ricky French has written about MONA in the Big Issue this week, and has used me.... (ME?!) as a barometer as to how bad he thinks MONA is.

Well, we'll see about that!
(loosely hints at an exhibition yet to be organised, now that I have about 20 new paintings... mumbling off into the distance...)

Thursday, October 31, 2013

Self Portrait - Icon Style

As the artist's ego gets out of control, he has elevated himself to saint-like status. What a wanker!